Five Sentence Fiction – Faeries
Seven miles from the nearest home Simon
had set up his camp, he traced the outline of his jaw in the crystal clear pool
of water. He had come this far down the
Appalachian trail in hopes of finding an escape but there in the water he could
see clearly the mark she left on his face and felt the one he could not see
even more. Simon heard the laugh, more
of a giggle; it broke him from his reflection as he stood from his crouched position
and heard the sound of the birds take fight, “even the birds are having a laugh
at me.”
He turned to stoke the small
dancing fire a hurt smile graced his chapped lips when the voice broke through the
chattering wilderness, “The heart scars so easily,” he was stuck in a haze of
confusion from the moment he saw her standing in the clearing with him. Her body covered in a slip of a purple dress,
hair a violent red with matching eyes and a mischievous grin but none of it was
as spectacular as the fluttering transparent wings and it was then he looked to
the trees around him, before he thought it was just fireflies but realized now they
were something so much more.
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Really well done! Crisp and interesting. "The heart scars so easily" is a lovely line. And so true!!
ReplyDeleteI love the strong visuals here. Nice work.
ReplyDeleteSimon is English, isn't he? "even the birds are having a laugh at me". Steven, this storyline is very good and I agree that the visuals are strong. It is a lovely story.;)))
ReplyDeleteThe sight of her would definitely have been mesmerising! Wonderful imagery, crystal clear water, the trail, the dancing fire...and then the clearly defined beauty of the faery!
ReplyDelete"He could see clearly the mark she left on his face and felt the one he could not see even more." And we guess what has happened. Running from heartbreak is when we are all most vulnerable. Wonderful characterization.
ReplyDeleteMy favorite line would have to be her description: "hair a violent red with matching eyes and a mischievous grin." So well done.