Sunday, January 22, 2012

Five Sentence Fiction - Radiance


Five Sentence Fiction - Radiance

Jackson quickly pulled the tattered orange trucker hat down over his swollen brown eyes, feeling the color rush from his face. He leaned forward cupping his hands around the warm tea, an attempt to stop the tremble of his hands, but could do nothing about the thundering echo of his boots as they smacked on the concrete. He was here first, there was no reason for him to leave when he glanced up to see her sit only a few tables away, unaware of his presence. His heart stopped when he saw him, it was not his appearance but the glow of bliss on her face as she greeted her new love. Jackson stood and turned to walk away taking one final glimpse to his lost love, their eyes met, and he smiled before he disappeared into the crowd. 




Be sure to check out more Five Sentence Fiction over at Lillie McFerrin's blog.

7 comments:

  1. A beautiful heartbreaking scene that looks at radiance from the other side. Really really well done.

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  2. Nice job illustrating radiance in such an unexpected way. I really enjoyed this story!

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  3. Lovely tale of heartache. Well done!

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  4. Oh, I know that precise feeling. Love the descriptions of a wrecked man who still manages a brave face when it counts. Great 5.

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  5. So many emotions in such a short space. Nice job :)

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  6. Thank you all!! I like how this one turned out.

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  7. I missed this last time around....very, very well done. I could feel the heartbreak!

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